Salam Alaikum sisters. Hope you are feeling well today🌸
Yesterday I had a meeting with my friend who is having phobia of being left. And now I can see one lady left the group. I’m accepting it as a sign to text you about it right now.
So today about the FEELING/ FEAR TO BE LEFT, to be abandoned/ undesired/ worthless…
When someone leaves you, it can make you feel like you don't matter to them/ him/ her. You may find yourself isolated and lonely, sad and guilty, or opposite very angry and may feel self pity. Usually people going through grief and stages.
This feeling can vary and arise in many situations. It’s very individual and actually it’s a big topic.
The most important to understand that we need all feelings, they making us to survive, understand things and to grow, emphasise and connect with others.
Most of us experienced that feeling in early childhood when our parents where leaving us alone/ with grandparents/ other relatives/ at nursery ect. Some of us still having that wound and this wound not allowing us to let go other people easy and living alone terrifying.
Usually LEAVING (LEFT) wound appears when child lost a contact with a parent of the opposite sex between the age of 1 to 3 years old. If happens example, when a father was often missing, didn’t engage with a daughter, or mother raised her completely alone. And opposite, when mother is missing from the boy’s life, a boy can establish this wound.
People who are having this early childhood wound/ trauma has a need to be attached. They need someone to be there, want support. Usually having difficulty in doing or deciding something when needed. Asking for advice that not necessary using, the most important is for them to ask. Seeking independence, loves intimacy.
Usually these people having
good appetite, loving soft food, their eating takes time.
They can develop back problems, asthma, bronchitis, myopia, rare diseases what need attention.
It’s all about seeking attention, want to be needed and even “owning” someone.
So today I’m encouraging everyone to turn to yourself and check if you aren’t afraid to be left/ abandoned/ worthless…
Maybe you noticed such people around you?
How are you feeling when someone leaving/ left you?
How to heal and help ourselves and others will text you next time InshaAllah.