Salam Alaikum sisters🌸 Hope you are doing well.
ABOUT “MOTIVATION” and MISTAKES
I will tell you my childhood story. No one in my class studied maths, even those who were good at maths used to skip lessons. The question is why? The answer is simple - because of the teacher. Some teachers are loved by children, others not. Why didn't anyone like this teacher? Because she was teaching maths herself: writes and rubs off the board, writes and rubs, not properly explained, just punished everyone with bad marks, denied children needs and feelings. All class pupil complained ( she was replaced with our parents help later ) but even now everyone remembers her words : “if you don't learn maths, you'll go to sell bubble gum on the streets”. At that time it was the most embarrassing job. That's how we been scared , or maybe "motivated".
Many of us have heard the same thing from the parents: “if you don't study- you won't have bread, you won't have anything, you will go to the container and will be begging on the street “.
These were threats to motivate children to study. Is it because of that we all became : directors, sellers, doctors, cleaners, engineers, teachers…No. Such motivations not only didn’t help us to study but caused fears that filed our subconscious. Most of us carrying fear of being poor, not having money, we live with a fear of being uncomfortable, disappointing others, making mistakes and suppressing our feelings in order to please everyone.
We are afraid of making mistakes in life. We afraid to try something new or do it in our own way. Everything was about mistakes in our childhood: mistakes in maths, mistakes in writing, did something, didn’t do something at home or school all the time we been scolded and punished.
I personally believe that each child is born good. I’ve never seen bad babies in my life.
So I’m inviting everyone in this group to think about how truthful were adults words in your childhood and what life showed. Was you really a bad child and needed to be punished? How many fears you are carrying from your childhood? Are you feeling you are yourself and is it easy to make your own choices in life?